Our Adoption Journey
Our love-story began back in 2005 as high school sweethearts! Growing up together through our teenage, young adult, and now adult years has allowed us to be best friends. When we married in 2013 we began trying to expand our family, but our journey to become parents was not what we expected. No one prepared us to go through the years of uncertainty, medications, and tests just to find out that having a child was just not in our biological plans. The physical, financial, and emotional toll throughout the entire fertility process can break down even the strongest people and couples. Together, we said ‘no’ to more medical procedures. Together, we re-wrote our ideals on what it means to be parents. Together, we decided we had a desire to be parents, not pregnant. Together, we chose adoption.
In December 2017 we began the homestudy process and signed on with an agency. We were excited and hopeful to begin the adoption process and were eager to understand the ins and outs of the adoption world. We became homestudy approved in March and felt enthusiastic to officially be a ‘waiting couple.’ Due to the agency we were with having too many families and not enough cases, in the 6 months we were with them, we were only submitted to a small handful of situations. We felt stuck and as if we were never going to find our baby. Looking back, we wished we would have tamed our excitement a tad and took our time in researching agencies more. But the one thing you should not do in this process is blame yourself in navigating a journey that you have never been on before. We did not have anyone near us that had adopted before and we were learning everything we knew from online resources.
The most difficult part of the adoption process was the rollercoaster of emotions of presenting to cases. We often got our hopes up high when we presented; you begin thinking what your life will be like with that birthmother and child. But what few cases we were presenting to, we were not being selected. It was devasting...every...single…time. It never got easier. We felt rejected and thought something was wrong with us. With so few situations we were seeing with our agency, we felt lost and not in control. We thought we would never find our baby. The agency we had selected was not emotionally supporting us and so we started from scratch and began researching agencies and this time, consultants. After a couple months of reaching out to past and current clients, we signed on with an amazing consultant. She checked in with us a few times a week, asked us how we were feeling, and really got to know who we were and us. We felt optimistic again and knew that our consultant would find us our baby.
From sign on to placement, we were with our amazing consultant for a short 7 weeks. We were matched on a Wednesday with a beautiful birthmother who was due in 3 weeks, but the next day we received another call that they were inducing her in 3 days. In that single phone call, we knew life was about to change and on July 3, 2018 when our sweet baby boy was born, our life changed forever. We realized then that there was nothing ‘wrong with us,’ we just hadn’t found our perfect match yet. We are so thankful for organizations like the Buescher Foundation who can provide financial relief to adoptive couples. The support allowed us to sign on with our consultant who found us our forever child.